My Rainbow After the Rain

As a mother my heart has been turned in,

turned out, and broken again and again.

No one can truly understand what I’ve seen

or gone where I’ve been.

After so many years all my memories

begin to blend in as one,

But time, though an enemy, will never make me

forget my daughter and my son.

I’ll never forget the grief,

the sorrow and the pain.

Sometimes when I think I’m over it

I feel it all over again.

But I’ve learned to take it in stride

and make it a part of me.

I’ll never take for granted how life can change so quickly.

When I close my eyes, I see Xavier’s smile

and it still melts my heart;

And how Gracelyn would harass you, then protect you–

a big bully giving it all she’s got.

Sometimes a song or a smell

takes me back to them there.

Some days they’re like the wind;

I can feel them everywhere.

And I’m glad I remember

and sad they’re not here.

Though the emotions can be depressing

they remind me I love them still.

Thank God I got you–

the light on my path

to see my way through,

Especially since I’m once again

in a dark hour

and don’t know what to do.

I can count on you to be my rock

and my strength when I’m weak and don’t want to be.

The one who keeps me believing everything

will be all right even though

the way is hard and I cannot see.

BJ, you are gentle, yet tough

and I’m so proud you’re my son,

And I look forward to us being together again

before it’s all said and done.

And I can’t wait for the world to make

sense again and everything is fine.

When you and I can sit on my bed

and watch our favorite show Once Upon a Time.

I can’t help but smile when I think of this

because it means more to me than you’ll ever know.

Treasuring our time together keeps me sound

and stops the tears when they threaten to flow.

I believe that’s why God gave you to me–

to keep me from going insane.

You are the joy that overcomes sorrow,

my rainbow after the rain.

Dedicated to Lashawn.

May your courage and your son lead you to more sunny days. 🌻

While going through the hardest times of my life, I met some amazing women, each with her own story of love, heartache, and grief. I’m honored that so many of them entrusted me with their stories. Here in the section called The Voices of My Sisters I have memorialized some of them in prose and dedicated them to each of the women they represent. I hope you enjoy them and can also relate. Feel free to share your own story. –D.L. Lunsford