As a mother my heart has been turned in,
turned out, and broken again and again.
No one can truly understand what I’ve seen
or gone where I’ve been.
After so many years all my memories
begin to blend in as one,
But time, though an enemy, will never make me
forget my daughter and my son.
I’ll never forget the grief,
the sorrow and the pain.
Sometimes when I think I’m over it
I feel it all over again.
But I’ve learned to take it in stride
and make it a part of me.
I’ll never take for granted how life can change so quickly.
When I close my eyes, I see Xavier’s smile
and it still melts my heart;
And how Gracelyn would harass you, then protect you–
a big bully giving it all she’s got.
Sometimes a song or a smell
takes me back to them there.
Some days they’re like the wind;
I can feel them everywhere.
And I’m glad I remember
and sad they’re not here.
Though the emotions can be depressing
they remind me I love them still.
Thank God I got you–
the light on my path
to see my way through,
Especially since I’m once again
in a dark hour
and don’t know what to do.
I can count on you to be my rock
and my strength when I’m weak and don’t want to be.
The one who keeps me believing everything
will be all right even though
the way is hard and I cannot see.
BJ, you are gentle, yet tough
and I’m so proud you’re my son,
And I look forward to us being together again
before it’s all said and done.
And I can’t wait for the world to make
sense again and everything is fine.
When you and I can sit on my bed
and watch our favorite show Once Upon a Time.
I can’t help but smile when I think of this
because it means more to me than you’ll ever know.
Treasuring our time together keeps me sound
and stops the tears when they threaten to flow.
I believe that’s why God gave you to me–
to keep me from going insane.
You are the joy that overcomes sorrow,
my rainbow after the rain.
© D.L. Lunsford
Dedicated to Lashawn.
May your courage and your son lead you to more sunny days. 🌻
While going through the hardest times of my life, I met some amazing women, each with her own story of love, heartache, and grief. I’m honored that so many of them entrusted me with their stories. Here in the section called The Voices of My Sisters I have memorialized some of them in prose and dedicated them to each of the women they represent. I hope you enjoy them and can also relate. Feel free to share your own story. –D.L. Lunsford